We searched for a few months for our first house and I'm pleased to say that a last minute change of my mind as to where I wanted to live brought us to the perfect home for us. We made the decision to get ourselves out of debt, which led to me finding a part time job (that has been not so part time) and re-affirming my knowledge that no matter where you live, or what you may have heard about a place, people are still asshats. While I've not made many friends down here, I've become more comfortable with myself and just hanging out alone; making steps back towards the happy go lucky loner I used to be.
I've taken my One Word for 2011 to heart and let go of a lot of the feelings and material things that I no longer needed. Some were burned away by fire, others were let go to the wind. Some were donated to charity and some found their way to the rubbish bin. I've cleaned house and my heart and made room for the things that are worth holding on to; while I never received formal closure to some wounds, I no longer need it. I'm still working on letting go, both of things in the past and the present and so I won't be leaving this in 2011. This little phrase is something that will stick with me and become a mantra of sorts; a sort of road map back to a happiness in which not a single fuck was given about what someone thought of me. I'm letting go of the stigmas and the fears and just embracing me. A fairy loving, tree hugging, dirt worshipping wife, woman and witch with a wild (yet slightly timid) heart, a fondness for earth and ale and a (sometimes cruel) sarcastic streak.
Which leads me into 2012's word(s), which build upon the foundation that I laid in 2011. These two, to me, go hand in hand because one cannot happen without the other. And they are:
1. To restore to health or soundness; cure.
2. To set right; repair,
3. To restore or be restored to friendly relations, harmony, etc.
4. To restore (a person) to spiritual wholeness.
I plan to heal from the traumas and injustices from my past. To restore the faiths and beliefs I've lost along the way. I want to restore my faith in myself; to know that my true, soulful, and genuine self is the best person I can ever be. And that I should never, ever apologize for any of it.
And in so doing, I plan to:
1. To grow or develop in a healthy or vigorous way, esp. as the result of a particularly favorable environment
2. To be in one's prime; be at the height of fame, excellence, influence, etc.
3. To be successful; prosper.
4. To grow luxuriantly, or thrive in growth, as a plant.
As in, to let the best parts of me grow, while the worst parts of me are left behind to wither away. I'm actually working on one of those 30 by 30 bucket lists for this year, to start on my 29th birthday. It may sound a bit ambitious, perhaps a bit like I'm setting myself up for disappointment, but I have this feeling in my guts that 2012 is going to be a big year for me. Even if it doesn't seem so big from the outside.
Here's a toast to the shiny new year! May it be filled with all the changes, dreams, growth and love you can handle.
P.S. Is anyone else picking one word or making a resolution this year?
P.P.S. What sort of recap would this be without a wee bit more photo sharing? Here are some snaps from 2011.