On Friday morning my husband was let go from his job, suddenly and without warning. 11 other employees were also let go, some had been at the company for 20+ years. When he told me, I was shocked, pissed at his company and immediately tallied a list of services to call and cancel.
My husband took it a bit differently than I did. He was hurt. After working his tail off and giving them his all, he was the second person to be let go. When they brought him in and told him, they didn't give him a reason; they assured him that it was not performance based. However, as someone who has never lost a job before, he took it very much to heart and while I wanted to slap someone in the head he just wanted an explanation.
It turns out his job was outsourced to another state, but still within the company. The company decided that rather than give anyone the option of moving with their job (and subsequently needing to help with relocation costs) they would lay everyone off and give them a small severance package. We only discovered this information because some of his friends were spared the axe and found out in a meeting held after the layoffs had ended.
In my humble opinion, that's a totally dick move.
The past few days have been kind of hazy as we're recovering from the financial blow and discussing what to do next. Hubs has a job offer in South Carolina and his old job is moving down there (and he was so happy at that job that he wants to stick with it) so he wants to reapply for that before accepting the first offer. We've made up our minds to move, provided one of the jobs pans out, to Greenville, South Carolina and are going to be going down in a few weeks to look at apartments and neighborhoods so I can get a feel for the area. He's been down there several times, but I have not. All of our friends and family live in our current area and I know I'll be driving home frequently to visit, but as hard as it will be to pack up our stuff and the kitties and move 10 hours away, the change of scenery will definitely do us some good.
Everything is happening so suddenly, I just need to remember to breathe.
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Amor es Eterno; a Matchbox Shrine
It's been far too long since I spent some quality time with my trusty exacto knife and lots of glue. Craftster is currently holding a papercraft challenge with the theme 'Valentine's themed Matchbox Shrine'. Shrine? I couldn't resist.
I hatched an idea, but had no matchboxes large enough to house it. I made my own matchbox using some card stock and then created this little shrine:
The overlying theme of the shrine is that love endures even after death. The inside of the shrine houses a skelly armed heart clutching a message in a bottle...
This wee shrine houses a secret however. Did you notice the small black tab to the right of the heart? No?
Behind this hidden door is a portrait of a happy, muchly deceased, couple.
I hatched an idea, but had no matchboxes large enough to house it. I made my own matchbox using some card stock and then created this little shrine:
The overlying theme of the shrine is that love endures even after death. The inside of the shrine houses a skelly armed heart clutching a message in a bottle...
This wee shrine houses a secret however. Did you notice the small black tab to the right of the heart? No?
Behind this hidden door is a portrait of a happy, muchly deceased, couple.
Saturday, January 16, 2010
Green Tea and Card Reading
Happy Saturday lovelies! I woke up shortly after the sun this morning and have spent the morning wrapped in my favorite afghan (a wedding gift from one of my oldest friend's mother) sketching ideas for some new art dolls and sipping green tea with honey. Lots of green tea with honey.
I wanted to take a moment to thank all of you for the words you left on my previous entry. Knowing that so many people here in my circle of friends and followers have had similar experiences or know someone who has been where I am, has made me feel a lot less alone and gloomy. It's nice to know that there are wonderful souls to talk to.
As I said in my entry, this weekend will be spent relaxing and the weather gods must have leaned in a sympathetic ear when I was vocalising that because today is an uncharacteristically mild mid January day in North Jersey. It's not even noon and I've already spent some time on the steps with my tea cup in my pajamas watching some birds fly by. In the brief time I was outside I spotted two of my favorite birds: a large old crow and a peregrine falcon. I also decided to do a few quick readings this morning, mostly simple yes or no questions but I also decided to do a 7 card spread inquiring as to what I can do to nurture my small Etsy shop and help it to succeed since I'm planning on working on some new pieces later today and tomorrow.
As I've been feeling a bit gloomy, I decided to use my newer Housewives Tarot deck rather than my tried and true Rider-Waite deck. The illustrations and bright colours of the Housewives deck always perk me up and put me in a great mood.
Here is what the spread looked like:
And here are the specific locations and cards as designated by the 7 card layout I chose to use:
Distant Past Influences: Page of Wands (Reversed)
Immediate Past Influences: 10 of Wands (Reversed)
Present Influence: Queen of Pentacles
Present Obstacles: Ace of Wands
Present Outlook: King of Pentacles (Reversed)
Future Influences: Queen of Cups
Future Outlook: Page of Pentacles (Reversed)
I interpreted the spread myself as each card came out and as a whole, but I'd like to see if anyone else wants to take a stab at interpreting the spread. I find that sometimes people who aren't directly vested in the outcome tend to see things that the querent will miss. Please leave your interpretation in comments or email it to me at artful.danni(at)gmail.com if you feel inclined to do so. :)
As for the rest of the day, I plan to finish this last cup of tea, wake the snoozing husband, do a bit of light shopping (it figures that we would run out of toilet paper the day I decide to relax!) and then spend as much time as possible outside enjoying the Indian summer kind of day that January is giving me.
I wanted to take a moment to thank all of you for the words you left on my previous entry. Knowing that so many people here in my circle of friends and followers have had similar experiences or know someone who has been where I am, has made me feel a lot less alone and gloomy. It's nice to know that there are wonderful souls to talk to.
As I said in my entry, this weekend will be spent relaxing and the weather gods must have leaned in a sympathetic ear when I was vocalising that because today is an uncharacteristically mild mid January day in North Jersey. It's not even noon and I've already spent some time on the steps with my tea cup in my pajamas watching some birds fly by. In the brief time I was outside I spotted two of my favorite birds: a large old crow and a peregrine falcon. I also decided to do a few quick readings this morning, mostly simple yes or no questions but I also decided to do a 7 card spread inquiring as to what I can do to nurture my small Etsy shop and help it to succeed since I'm planning on working on some new pieces later today and tomorrow.
As I've been feeling a bit gloomy, I decided to use my newer Housewives Tarot deck rather than my tried and true Rider-Waite deck. The illustrations and bright colours of the Housewives deck always perk me up and put me in a great mood.
Here is what the spread looked like:
And here are the specific locations and cards as designated by the 7 card layout I chose to use:
Distant Past Influences: Page of Wands (Reversed)
Immediate Past Influences: 10 of Wands (Reversed)
Present Influence: Queen of Pentacles
Present Obstacles: Ace of Wands
Present Outlook: King of Pentacles (Reversed)
Future Influences: Queen of Cups
Future Outlook: Page of Pentacles (Reversed)
I interpreted the spread myself as each card came out and as a whole, but I'd like to see if anyone else wants to take a stab at interpreting the spread. I find that sometimes people who aren't directly vested in the outcome tend to see things that the querent will miss. Please leave your interpretation in comments or email it to me at artful.danni(at)gmail.com if you feel inclined to do so. :)
As for the rest of the day, I plan to finish this last cup of tea, wake the snoozing husband, do a bit of light shopping (it figures that we would run out of toilet paper the day I decide to relax!) and then spend as much time as possible outside enjoying the Indian summer kind of day that January is giving me.
Friday, January 15, 2010
Less cycles and a disease
Let me tell you, some of the gynecology offices in my town are staffed with incredibly rude people. I haven't gone to the gynecologist in an embarrassingly long time and my newly developed cyst was the swift kick in the ass I needed to find a doctor and make an appointment.
I called around to a few of the highest recommended offices in my town to inquire about new patients and was hung up on, informed that no matter the reason they had no appointments until July and when I inquired as to other offices in the area to try I was given a lot of grief. The final office I called is the one I decided to go with as the woman on the phone was helpful, sympathetic, and incredibly knowledgeable. As an added bonus she even squeezed me in yesterday afternoon.
When I met the doctor I instantly liked her. She came in, introduced herself and chatted with me as a friend and not just a doctor. She interviewed me about my current condition, my cycles, pains that I have and when, mood swings I have and when they occur... she was very detailed, thorough and when I couldn't quite get the words out would ask me the same question in a different way to make sure she understood exactly what I was trying to get across. It's often hard for me to describe feelings of discomfort and pain when they aren't happening currently.
After the exam I was given two diagnoses, the first is that I very definitely suffer from premenstrual dysphoric disorder. The second and more upsetting diagnosis is that I have endometriosis. My case is classical, I have pains at all the right times during my cycles, tenderness in all the right places. It's incurable but it can be treated and blessedly, mine seems to be mild.
After discussing my options for treatment my doctor and I decided that the best route to take at this point is to put me on birth control which will reduce the frequency of my periods to just 4 times a year. It's a little scary to me, since I'm used to getting it every single month like clockwork, but if I don't cycle as frequently then I can't build up as much scar tissue from the disease. We decided on this because while I don't wish to get pregnant right now, I'd like to have children some day. The more scar tissue you build up, the greater your chances of becoming infertile are.
When the doctor diagnosed me yesterday, I took it very well. I didn't even flinch. In the last 24 hours I've retreated into my brain while I juggle several emotions; confusion, sadness, worry, anger. It's hit me that I have a disease that has no cure and that I will have this for the rest of my life. Treatments range from simply taking birth control pills unless trying to conceive or pregnant to surgical procedures involving invasive techniques and scrapings to a full hysterectomy. It's something that weighs heavily on me as a maiden woman who would like to bridge the gap to motherhood when the time is right. It weighs heavily on me as something that will be a part of me until menopause or the removal of organs.
I plan to spend the weekend in meditation and relaxation. Take long soothing baths and commune with the element that rules my heart, sit outside if the weather is mild and ground with Earth's calming steady power. I plan to think, create, sleep and to just make time for me and no one else.
I called around to a few of the highest recommended offices in my town to inquire about new patients and was hung up on, informed that no matter the reason they had no appointments until July and when I inquired as to other offices in the area to try I was given a lot of grief. The final office I called is the one I decided to go with as the woman on the phone was helpful, sympathetic, and incredibly knowledgeable. As an added bonus she even squeezed me in yesterday afternoon.
When I met the doctor I instantly liked her. She came in, introduced herself and chatted with me as a friend and not just a doctor. She interviewed me about my current condition, my cycles, pains that I have and when, mood swings I have and when they occur... she was very detailed, thorough and when I couldn't quite get the words out would ask me the same question in a different way to make sure she understood exactly what I was trying to get across. It's often hard for me to describe feelings of discomfort and pain when they aren't happening currently.
After the exam I was given two diagnoses, the first is that I very definitely suffer from premenstrual dysphoric disorder. The second and more upsetting diagnosis is that I have endometriosis. My case is classical, I have pains at all the right times during my cycles, tenderness in all the right places. It's incurable but it can be treated and blessedly, mine seems to be mild.
After discussing my options for treatment my doctor and I decided that the best route to take at this point is to put me on birth control which will reduce the frequency of my periods to just 4 times a year. It's a little scary to me, since I'm used to getting it every single month like clockwork, but if I don't cycle as frequently then I can't build up as much scar tissue from the disease. We decided on this because while I don't wish to get pregnant right now, I'd like to have children some day. The more scar tissue you build up, the greater your chances of becoming infertile are.
When the doctor diagnosed me yesterday, I took it very well. I didn't even flinch. In the last 24 hours I've retreated into my brain while I juggle several emotions; confusion, sadness, worry, anger. It's hit me that I have a disease that has no cure and that I will have this for the rest of my life. Treatments range from simply taking birth control pills unless trying to conceive or pregnant to surgical procedures involving invasive techniques and scrapings to a full hysterectomy. It's something that weighs heavily on me as a maiden woman who would like to bridge the gap to motherhood when the time is right. It weighs heavily on me as something that will be a part of me until menopause or the removal of organs.
I plan to spend the weekend in meditation and relaxation. Take long soothing baths and commune with the element that rules my heart, sit outside if the weather is mild and ground with Earth's calming steady power. I plan to think, create, sleep and to just make time for me and no one else.
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Loafing Resolution
Happy Sunday, everyone. I hope today finds you all warm. I also hope that the new calendar year is being kind to you.
I have fresh hot coffee in hand and am loafing about on the computer in a vain attempt to get out of some housework. I know the dishes will still be there when I get up, but a girl can dream that they'll clean themselves, right?
I resolved to do quite a few things this year, and after thinking about it for a good long time, the power word I picked for this year is growth and I don't mean that in the spherical sense. My goals along my spiritual path, artistically and in terms of emotional fortitude are all encompassed in that singular word.
This year I have resolved to keep creating and not to let lackluster Etsy sales through Autumn and the holidays get me down. I'd like to draw more frequently and maybe *gasp* take a painting class. I've resolved to visit, photograph and document at least a dozen new abandonments. I'm also going to work in my art journal more, I've been neglecting it and I miss it.
Spiritually, I'm going to focus on creating my own traditions, an idea that's been rattling about in my head since Jupiter at Carnelian Chronicles asked about individual traditions and worked on getting her own thoughts out on paper. To track this I'll be creating a Grimoire. As a final spiritual resolution, I'd like to begin studying the tarot more in depth.
My personal resolutions regarding health and emotions are already coming along very well. I resolved to eat better this year and drop this post marriage weight that I swear appeared over night. While part of my health goal was also to exercise more frequently, possibly including taking up yoga and belly dance, those plans have been put on hold by my recent hospital stay. I was having tremendous abdominal pains and went to the hospital where I was told I have a good sized ovarian cyst that will need constant monitoring until it goes away or requires surgery. I've been ordered to rest and wait as rupturing the cyst could cause even bigger problems such as internal bleeding and appendicitis.
Maybe I can use doctor's orders as an excuse for loafing just a bit longer. :)
I have fresh hot coffee in hand and am loafing about on the computer in a vain attempt to get out of some housework. I know the dishes will still be there when I get up, but a girl can dream that they'll clean themselves, right?
I resolved to do quite a few things this year, and after thinking about it for a good long time, the power word I picked for this year is growth and I don't mean that in the spherical sense. My goals along my spiritual path, artistically and in terms of emotional fortitude are all encompassed in that singular word.
This year I have resolved to keep creating and not to let lackluster Etsy sales through Autumn and the holidays get me down. I'd like to draw more frequently and maybe *gasp* take a painting class. I've resolved to visit, photograph and document at least a dozen new abandonments. I'm also going to work in my art journal more, I've been neglecting it and I miss it.
Spiritually, I'm going to focus on creating my own traditions, an idea that's been rattling about in my head since Jupiter at Carnelian Chronicles asked about individual traditions and worked on getting her own thoughts out on paper. To track this I'll be creating a Grimoire. As a final spiritual resolution, I'd like to begin studying the tarot more in depth.
My personal resolutions regarding health and emotions are already coming along very well. I resolved to eat better this year and drop this post marriage weight that I swear appeared over night. While part of my health goal was also to exercise more frequently, possibly including taking up yoga and belly dance, those plans have been put on hold by my recent hospital stay. I was having tremendous abdominal pains and went to the hospital where I was told I have a good sized ovarian cyst that will need constant monitoring until it goes away or requires surgery. I've been ordered to rest and wait as rupturing the cyst could cause even bigger problems such as internal bleeding and appendicitis.
Maybe I can use doctor's orders as an excuse for loafing just a bit longer. :)
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