The garden is dying back. Tomato plants, spent yet trying to turn out one last crop of wee tomatoes, hang limp and yellowing on their supports. Their leaves curling and crunching, slumping beneath the weight of tired stems while below them, the first tendrils of Winter peas are emerging from the soft dirt. We will get one final harvest of Summer's bounty before the Winter crops take over.
The urge to open wide all the windows and invite in the comfortable Autumn breezes yesterday was overwhelming. I had a headache thumping away in my skull and after my visit to my garden, I took a long, soothing nap in my bed. Warmed by the golden rays of the afternoon sun, kept cool by the breezes rustling the tulle on the bed frame. The scents of warm roses and rosemary mingling with that of the decaying leaves littering the Earth. A much needed respite from aches and pains and technology.
There were big plans for yesterday afternoon; being a full moon under a strong sign on a lucky day, it seemed the best possible day to work on cleansing and re-warding. To invite in the good and really shoo away the bad. But, even the best laid plans can be waylaid by feeling unwell and in my workings, intention is so very key that results can be achieved without a lot of pomp and circumstance. Simple tasks done with intention replaced the all out scrubbing I had originally planned.
When night fell, offerings of spiced rum, sweet cider and tokens of the harvest were set on the altar. Candles were lit to the Gods and to honor the Moon herself. Incense smoke drifted lazily over the space. I lit a candle to send my full moon wishes up to the starry sky and began to shuffle the cards for guidance in this moon cycle. As I shuffled, there were jumpers - cards that leap from the deck to get your attention - and I laid them on the altar in the order in which they fell.
The thief alerts one to stolen time, to missed opportunity - he takes things to teach us to value and appreciate, to help us move on from a sticking point. The Blessing teaches us to begin each journey, each new day, each new step forward with a blessing. As she is shrouded in darkness, but holding a blessing aloft she instructs us to uncover the value and blessings hidden in struggle. The juggler is a card I've been pulling quite a bit lately and one I feel identifies myself right now, in my current state. The juggler has a bad habit of taking on too many things at once and it's only a matter of time until he misses one of those glass balls and it falls, shattering, to the ground. The juggler's attention is scattered and all over the place and this fae is a call to wake up, re-evaluate your priorities and to reassess things. The Lady of Faith tells us to shield our bodies, to shield our heads, but to never, ever shield our hearts. She looks deep within herself to find answers, she has a deep trust in love and compassion and her faith in herself, in her heart are unwavering.
The four here, work together to weave a tale of time (and humor) being stolen (a blessing in disguise) to alert one to their role as juggler and their need to re-prioritize before the things they are juggling come crashing down around them. The Lady of Faith reminds us that in our quest to lay things down gently, to reassess and regain what was stolen, that we must have faith in ourselves, in our hearts and in the love that surrounds us. We must not shield ourselves entirely if we are to succeed in our quest.
Given the thoughts in my head, the feelings in my heart and the small steps I've started to take lately to regain some of my own time and happiness, to regroup and reconnect with the person inside of me who doesn't take on everyone else's problems, doesn't waste tons of time online, is healthy, active and most importantly isn't so damn serious but is joyful and carefree... I'd say the Fae's message is one of hope and encouragement. I'm on the right path, I just need to keep going.
I can't pinpoint exactly when in the past few months I got lost, when my sense of humor slipped out the back door, but I'm tired of letting stress and the ho-hums and negativity and misery of others and the world at large drag me down and suck the life out of me. And in this time of in-betweens, in the season of Death and Rebirth, I will cut those things from my life with the sharpest of scythes and lay them to burn on the woodpile. And while I'm feeling the urge to Hermit myself away to deal with all of this, I will take caution not to shut up my heart, for therein, I'm sure, lies the key.